Dialers.

Yesterday I found out I had a dialer on my PC. Dialers are these little spyware shit programs that install on your pc without you even knowing. Then, if you live in a country retarded enough to still use dialup, it dials a number located on a planet outside our solar system and starts downloading porn while charging you obscene amounts of money.
You can imagine my surprise when I picked up the phone and heard the characteristic CHCHCHCHCHCHCHZZZZZZDOINGDOING of the modem. I immediately proceeded to rip the phone plug off the wall only to realise that the modem was connected to the other plug, so I ripped that off too. I then ran Spybot which hopefully removed the fucking thing once and for all, but not before it had charged me god-knows-how much, and I didn't even get to see any porn.
I guess the only thing left to do now is wait for the phone bill. I have decided to read the phone bill in reverse, i.e. starting from the last digit and reading backwards, so as to not be shocked with the actual amount I have to pay. I don't think I will get away with just passing out though. I expect a stroke and/or heart attack, since the price is over $2/min. Oh, if you want to help a poor soul, paypal me some money to poromenos@poromenos.org to help my cause and I will love you for ever and ever and ever. Also I will do anything you want as long as it involves sex with beautiful women.